Lawson writes . . . sharing thoughts and memories

March 29, 2013

Bullies

Filed under: Uncategorized — lawsonjolly @ 5:00 am

I observed a bully today!  She was large . . . he was very young and small.   I watched.  It was not for me to intervene.  But I was reminded of something I have shared.

I hate bullies! I know hate is a strong word, and I shouldn’t hate anybody. And I don’t mean I hate the person, but I certainly have a very strong dislike for people who are bullies. I have known bullies all my life and those memories I cannot forget.

My first experience with a bully was in the third grade. I remember he pushed us around on the playground and everyone cowered away from him. He was larger than any of us, and we felt like he was Goliath. Then one day we evidently remembered David facing him. We had no plan to march out against him, not even all three of us together. We wouldn’t dare try to use a rock and slingshot because if we missed, we were doomed!

But we did devise a plan. Between my home and the school, there was a large rock wall around a home. We left school immediately when we were dismissed, and we ran to that rock wall. We crouched down on it as if we could not be seen. As we expected, the bully was walking on our side of the road, and he was by himself. When he passed beneath us, we all three jumped down on him just like a cowboy in the movies jumping the bank robber. I really can’t remember the result, except that a scuffle ensued. No one was hurt that I remember, and perhaps, we three all ran after we pounced on him. I do recall that he sneered at us at school on the next several days. I also recall that we did not have any real problems with him after that. In fact, I remember choosing him to be on my team one day when we were playing dodgeball.

The next memory of dealing with a coward was in the seventh grade. Our family had moved and I was in a new school. However, I became immediate friends with many of the boys because our parents knew one another. I was soon chosen to be a Safety Patrol. I was given a certain corner to patrol. There were very few cars, but it was a big deal at school to be a patrolman at a corner. There was one fellow, and I remember his name to this day, who was only in the sixth grade. Yet, he was larger than any of us in the seventh. We had no interaction during school, at recess or other times, but everyone knew his attitude and meanness. He would go by many of the patrolmen and start a fight. Several of us got together and decided we would be a posse when needed. We developed a loud call. We were to yell, Yahoo!

The day soon came that he came by my corner. It was a deliberate route for him. It was not the shortest way to his home. I do not recall the conversation or threat. Although smaller, I did have a pugilist attitude, and suddenly we were rolling on the ground, locked together. I was holding him close so he would not have enough room to throw a punch. As we wrestled, I yelled, Yahoo! Within minutes, about four of the other patrolmen came. I remember they pulled him off me, and several of the fellows were hitting him. By now, there was a crowd, and soon a teacher stopped as she was leaving school and sent us all home. I would observe this boy over the next several years. I remained scared of him, but at the same time would speak to him, and even walk from school with his two younger brothers on occasion. Sadly to say, this young man broke into a home, tied up the two elderly people and ransacked the home and stole a car. His fate, of course, was prison. I have often thought of him, and I have regretted that I did not have the maturity or understanding about life to have befriended him. Perhaps a friend who loved him could have made the difference.

I still have a problem, to this day, with bullies! They may be the elementary age, or teenager. I really get upset with bullies of all kinds and shapes. They come in various ages, colors, weights, and gender. But the ones that really get me angry are those adults who have small children. Those bullies that someone is calling “Mother or Daddy.” You have seen them in public. A harsh voice, a jerk of the arm, a swift hand . . . and all in anger. Sometimes I think they are trying to prove to the public that they are in charge! Where you have a bully, you will have someone being abused! We all are aware of the abuse of children and spouses today by bullies!

Bullies are people who are determined to get their way. All bullies have a problem. The problem is not with others, but with self. And where the bully spirit exists, I believe the spirit of Christ is lacking in that life. Of course, most of them probably don’t know how different they could be with Him in their life. Most bullies are also modeling the way they were treated. So, perhaps that is a hint to us of a lack of spiritual heritage. Bullies reveal an immaturity, both emotionally and spiritually. And remember, a bully is not limited to the male role!

There is an answer to this problem.

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come.”  (2 Corinthians 5:17) 
“Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another . . . .”  (Ephesians 4:31, 32)“Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.”  (Ephesians 6:4)

Lawson

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